Do’s & Don’ts
10 September, 2015
Do’s & Don’ts
What a silly month of year August is when it comes to feeding ourselves with news. In August, don’t even bother to peep into wires and papers – they are so empty and dry! And if there appears a piece or two that might catch the eye, they still seem so inconsequential that you want to skip them without any second thoughts. Imagine a professional journalist’s busy life without a portion of news to be swallowed in the morning like a
pill that keeps him ticking. This is exactly the time when a journalist goes into meditation about more substantial themes than regular news of the day might reflect. And this is where I am now, refreshing my mind for some political in-depth thinking. Please look again at the title for a brief second – Do’s & Don’ts! What I mean here is that there are things that Georgia is welcome to do and there are some that it must refrain from undertaking. And we Georgians will have to mind it all. The Do’s: dance and sing away our lifetime wherever and whenever we find ourselves fit and comfortable to – stage, home, on the air, streets, stadiums, restaurants, weddings, birthday parties; eat out each others’ hearts for achieving the goals that are not terribly attractive; wait for the government to give us the underserved bread-and-butter who is not intending to do so; bring up the kids who will always depend on us both monetarily and psychologically; open one TV channel per capita to watch; continue making the toasts to each other that make zero sense; sell education that will not sell; encourage gay or otherwise scandalous way of life to perpetuate a demographic catastrophe in the dwindling nation; carry on with building extravagant cemeteries, overloaded with concrete and heavy tasteless grave stones, sitting on the chests of those who can no longer complain under the pressure; always work on the import of foreign-made food stuff and never cultivate our own lands that are fertile but idly at rest; flee the country massively in search of means of survival and let the outlandish cultures and peoples inhabit our soil that will never be empty when we are gone; stop marrying each other so that children are no longer born to continue the nation; stop having sex, and use drugs and spirits instead, thus adding to the morbidity of our warped existence; put the sleaziest possible graffiti on all the walls of every building around to give the book-hating youth something to read; stone relentlessly the humans of nonconventional sexual orientation and promote sexism to endear ourselves to Russia, thus saving our butts from recurred slavery; take it easy if our territorial conflicts are frozen and forgotten by international community; sell our lands and real estate to our rich neighbors because they love our sun and waters; destroy our gorgeous environment with thick smoking pollution and reeking garbage all over the place, robbing the future generations of Mother Nature’s gifts; annihilate the gregeotv.geen parks everywhere and fill the towns where people need to breathe to survive with concrete. The Don’ts: dare say anything bad and irritating against the Russian occupation so that they feel happy and are not likely to make war against Georgia; worry about the GEL freefall and nose-diving economy because the current Georgian administration is out there to watch over us vigilantly; get angry with the government for not performing as you had expected they would because there is a hope that someday they will; try to ask West a straight question that they should work way more effectually to make the politically hilarious status quo change for us; exasperate NATO and Euro-Union with our impatience to squeeze our lean body into their sated household because nobody can put up with nervousness; ask America if they know that niceties and cowardice are not working with bears; complain loudly about those vain political contradictions and clashes, destroying the nation quick and sure right in front of our eyes for a plain reason that complaining is ridiculous and never reaches any significant ears; dream about lost territories to come back because this makes us look foozled and naïve; whine about hardships and unemployment because this does not simply make any sense; despair about business not developing fast and vigorously enough to feed the starving part of our skinny population; feel frustrated for having been promised a lot and not having received what we had imagined we would; become astonished at our northern border creeping south, because if we do, we might look and sound politically incorrect in the eyes of both the nemeses and friends; cry over the spilled blood in Ukraine for somebody might get us wrong; regret the mistakes of the past – they only make the Nation feel great today; think of and plan well the country’s future for God loves us, and He will take real good care of our nation. These two lists – as different as they are – may go on and on and on. So what? – A curious reader might ask for more clarity, and the author, having created them at leisure and at random, will refrain from a loud response, just thinking to himself that in the news-poor August there was nothing better to do except this politicized attempt to hone his pen – September has come and he’d better keep it sharp.

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